When I was in my twenties and early thirties, I had a lot of people tell me, “you need to work out how to find your direction”. At the time, I felt completely lost and directionless, which was disheartening and stressful, especially when it seemed like everyone else around me had it all figured out.
Years later, after I began working with clients, I was comforted to learn that even the most seemingly put-together people feel lost from time to time. In some ways, it can be the catalyst for positive change. It’s an opportunity for reflection, self-discovery, and a deeper sense of connection to what really matters to you.
If you’ve been wandering through life without a clear path, know that you’re not alone and maybe more importantly, know that it’s okay to feel this way. Regardless of where you are in your life, there are practical steps to help you navigate your way through uncertainty to discover a path that feels right.
1. Spend 10 minutes each morning journalling: “What I want most is…”
Give yourself space to connect with your inner wisdom by spending time each morning with your journal. At the top of the page, write: “What I want most is…” and let your thoughts flow without judgement.
The key here is to keep your pen moving. Don’t worry about making sense or being logical; just write whatever comes to mind.
Sometimes, we get stuck because we’re too focused on trying to figure everything out perfectly in our heads. The magic of journalling is that it bypasses our overthinking minds and allows us to access deeper thoughts, feelings, and desires that might be buried beneath the surface.
Don’t be discouraged if you don’t find your direction right away. Over time, you’ll start to notice patterns and themes in what you’re writing. You’ll see glimpses of what truly lights you up and what you most want from your life. From there, you can begin to shape a direction that feels authentic and meaningful to you.
2. Your feelings will help you to find direction
We often spend so much time in our heads, trying to think our way out of confusion that we forget to tune into one of our greatest sources of wisdom: our hearts. When you’re feeling directionless, it’s easy to weigh up the pros and cons, to seek advice from others or to reflect on your prior experiences and logically map out the next steps. But sometimes, the answers we’re seeking aren’t found in logic — they’re found in our feelings.
Take a few minutes each day, ideally after a meditation practice, to sit quietly, close your eyes, and breathe deeply as you ask yourself, “What do I really want?”
Don’t force an answer or rush this process; just sit with the question and trust that, deep down, you already know what you want.
If you prefer a guided meditation, try using this track of mine each day for at least a week.
3. Make a list of what holds you back
It’s likely that one of the reasons you find it difficult to find your direction is that you’re carrying around baggage that isn’t really yours. Expectations from society, pressure from loved ones, old stories we tell ourselves about what we can and can’t do — these things can cloud our judgement and make it hard to admit that we know what we want but we’re holding ourselves back.
Take some time to list the things that might be holding you back from being who you want to be. This could include limiting beliefs like, “I’m not talented enough,” or, “It’s too late for me to start something new.” It might also include commitments you’ve made that no longer feel aligned or advice you’ve taken from others that doesn’t resonate with you.
Once you have this list, look at it with compassion. Recognise that some of these beliefs may have served you but now it’s time to let them go. Freeing yourself from these external influences will make it easier to trust the answers you have within you.
4. Remind yourself that it’s never too late to change
In order to avoid regret, you need to proactively create a life that you love. In the busyness of daily life, it’s easy to forget just how precious and brief our time on this earth is. We get caught up in responsibilities, obligations, and our regular routines, and before we know it, years have passed.
Take a moment to reflect on what really matters. What are the things that make you feel alive? What dreams have you tucked away because they didn’t seem practical?
Remind yourself that it’s never too late to pursue the things that bring you joy. Whether it’s learning a new skill, changing careers or simply spending more time with loved ones — now is the time to make space for the things that make your heart sing. You don’t want to look back with regret, wishing you had made different choices.
5. Take one small step once you find your direction
When we feel directionless, the idea of making a big, sweeping change often feels overwhelming. But you don’t need to overhaul your entire life overnight. The single most important thing you can do to create change is to take small, consistent steps toward the things that matter to you.
Start by identifying one small step you can take today that will move you in the direction of your dreams. Maybe it’s signing up for a class, reaching out to someone for advice, or setting aside a few hours a week to work on a passion project. These small actions may seem insignificant in the moment, but over time, they add up and create momentum.
The key is to keep moving, even if the steps are tiny. Progress doesn’t have to be fast or dramatic — it just has to be consistent and steady. And as you take these small steps, it’s very likely that you’ll find that the path ahead becomes clearer.
If you’re still stuck after trying these steps, please reach out to chat about coaching.
