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Category: Leadership

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    • Quiet confidence: A new approach to leadership coaching for women

      So many of the leadership coaching women I work with tell me that when they were young, they were praised for being good, nice, and well-behaved. This lines up with the research of Dr Carol Dweck, psychologist and author of the best-selling book Mindset….

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    Uncertainty has been a consistent theme in my life at the moment. With clients, friends, family and even for me at a personal level.I feel hugely grateful for mindfulness practices during times like these and I’ve also found the following five steps to be helpful.1. Find pockets of certainty, wherever you canTidy the house, sort your finances, clean out your wardrobe, organise your paperwork, plan your meals for a week. Making the small things around you feel ordered and beautiful will help you to feel a little more at peace.2. Appreciate the things that make your life beautifulOne of the things I became aware of while we were on holiday in Tassie was how much natural beauty was around us every day. Try engaging your sense of gratitude with every meal you eat, every friendly encounter, every interaction with nature and every opportunity you have to experience or engage in creativity.3. Make time for practices that are genuinely soothingIf meditation isn’t your thing (and it isn’t for many people), try a different form of mindful relaxation. On a recent Insight Timer Live we explored this topic together and came up with dancing, singing, reading, walking, yoga, pilates, gardening, playing, sketching, painting, skiing, paddle boarding, surfing. The most important thing is that you make time for whatever it is that brings you some calm. 4. Acknowledge your feelings and offer yourself compassionMake room for all of the emotions – the fear, anxiety, worry, sadness, anger, frustration and powerlessness. Notice where you feel those emotions in your body and offer yourself genuine compassion.5. Make peace with uncertainty, as best you canWe won’t feel uncertainty every day but it’s likely that we’ll experience it often in our lives and we’ll probably always find it difficult. Remind yourself that nothing will stay the same forever and you’re strong enough to handle this. ✨
    “May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” Nelson Mandela ✨
    “And into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul.” John Muir ✨
    A follow on from last week’s post about aspiring to simplicity. I’m on holiday in Tasmania where I was lucky enough to live for ten years. Yesterday, as we drove through the countryside, I was struck by a lovely memory. At around the age of 12, I spotted many abandoned little cottages, very much like this one. I knew at the time that the simple beauty was all that I would ever want and need in my lifetime. A humble home surrounded by plenty of nature. I had a picture of myself planting a garden, reading by the fire, writing at a little wooden desk and baking in an old fashioned kitchen. Maybe one day having my own children and sharing my love of nature with them. Almost 50 years later, it’s still all of these things that fill me with joy and give my life meaning. I think most of us knew ourselves well at that age yet often, we lost trust in what we believed in and started shaping ourselves to please other people. Can you remember what it was you dreamed of? ✨
    An invitation to go a little more gently this week. To let go of some of your striving. To notice the things that you already have. And to make sure that you really do treasure them. ✨💛
    Since writing last week's post, I've had my value of 'inner harmony' front of mind, because it's something I don't always find easy.I've been a worrier all my life, so even after years of meditation practice, I sometimes find it hard to create a quiet mind – unless I'm immersed in nature. When Chris encouraged me to try paddle boarding a few years ago, I had no idea if I'd be able to do it. I'm not naturally sporty so things like this don't come easily. But something magical happened when I first stood on that board and looked into the beautiful clear water.I felt (and still feel) transported to a place that removes me from all of my worries. I become immersed in the wonder beneath me. The forests of seaweed, the schools of fish, the way the sunlight creates patterns on the seabed and once, we paddled with dolphins. All of it is truly magical (and quite miraculous that I can keep my balance). I didn't mention last week that one of my other values is courage, which is the one I embraced when I first went out onto the water.The irony is that some of the moments that bring the most peace are made possible when I do something that scares me. ✨
    One of the things I do with almost every new client I work with is a values exercise. It's such a powerful tool to help you identify what really matters in your life. Once you've chosen your personal values, you begin to understand why certain choices, places or relationships, feel so right. And why others really don’t. Your values will help you make meaningful choices that shape how you live every day. And as soon as you start living in alignment with your values, your life immediately becomes more meaningful.Do you know your top three values? I’d love you to share them if you do. Mine are inner harmony, kindness and connection. As well as connection with others and myself, this includes a deep sense of connection with nature which is why we live where we do. 🌿 If you’re interested to discover your values, I’ve included a link in my bio to an easy exercise that will help you gain clarity on yours. It really can be life-changing. ✨
    This morning on @insighttimer Live, I spoke about the practice of gratitude and how research has found it to be an antidote to many physical and psychological challenges.It can improve sleep, reduce fatigue, and lower levels of cellular inflammation. One study found that those who practice on a regular basis experience less depression and are more resilient following traumatic events.Another called it “the mother of all virtues”, in that it encourages other virtues such as patience, humility, and wisdom.In my own life, it has been a daily practice for a few decades now. At the end of each day, an app on my phone called Grateful sounds a reminder and allows me to add a few words and photos.The best thing is that I now have a collection of my favourite memories that I can scroll through at any time. I took this pic just over a week ago at our local beach. At the end of an afternoon of swimming and paddling with Meg and me, Oscar said, “Grandma, that was the best day ever.” I love that he’s already grateful for the simple pleasures. ☀️
    Five ways to be more true to yourself this year.I spent so much of my time in my twenties and thirties doing things to please other people instead of trusting myself and listening to my heart. It wasn't until I found the courage to accept that I might be criticised no matter what I chose that I found the courage to be true to myself. And I can honestly tell you, it's life changing. I hope the following quick tips help. 1. Let go of the idea that you need to do what’s expected of you. In Bronnie Ware's book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, number one on the list is, "I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."2. Believe that you’re strong enough to handle some criticism. It might still be hurtful but after a short amount of time, that hurt will pass. The more you're being real, the less critical you'll be of yourself, and that's energising.3. Trust that you already know what fulfills you. Often when I meet a new client they tell me they don't know what they want. Once we get talking, it turns out that they do, but like all of us, it can be confronting to be really honest with themselves. 4. Give up one thing that hasn’t been serving you. This can be literally anything. Whatever it is that you choose, do it from a place of self-love not from a place of self-criticism.5. Take one courageous step towards the life of your dreams. It doesn't need to be huge but when you want something to change, there has to be some action taken. Make the phone call, update your profile, send (or accept) an invitation, join a class...it doesn't matter what you choose, just do something. ✨
    © Kate James 2025

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