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Blog

Category: Mindfulness - Page 4 of 4

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    • The Dalai Lama on a quiet mind

    I loved Sarah Wilson’s article in this week’s Sunday Life magazine (a copy of which is also available on Sarah’s blog). Sarah was due to meet with the Dalai Lama last week and a few days ahead of time she found herself wondering about what…

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    Posted in: Mindfulness
    Meditation Workshop

    A couple of weekends ago I ran my first one day meditation retreat in Melbourne and it was a fantastic day. I sent out an invitation to women I knew and the class filled in no time – it was one of those days that…

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    Posted in: Mindfulness
    5 steps to reduce anxiety

    Many of the people I work with tell me they are feeling more anxious than usual. It has been an unsettling time in the world – both financially and environmentally. For those of us living in Victoria, the bushfires heightened our sensitivity to global warming…

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    Posted in: Mindfulness
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    Five ways to be more true to yourself this year. I spent so much of my time in my twenties and thirties doing things to please other people instead of trusting myself and listening to my heart. It wasn't until I found the courage to accept that I might be criticised no matter what I chose that I found the courage to be true to myself. And I can honestly tell you, it's life changing. I hope the following quick tips help. 1. Let go of the idea that you need to do what’s expected of you. In Bronnie Ware's book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, number one on the list is, "I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me." 2. Believe that you’re strong enough to handle some criticism. It might still be hurtful but after a short amount of time, that hurt will pass. The more you're being real, the less critical you'll be of yourself, and that's energising. 3. Trust that you already know what fulfills you. Often when I meet a new client they tell me they don't know what they want. Once we get talking, it turns out that they do, but like all of us, it can be confronting to be really honest with themselves. 4. Give up one thing that hasn’t been serving you. This can be literally anything. Whatever it is that you choose, do it from a place of self-love not from a place of self-criticism. 5. Take one courageous step towards the life of your dreams. It doesn't need to be huge but when you want something to change, there has to be some action taken. Make the phone call, update your profile, send (or accept) an invitation, join a class...it doesn't matter what you choose, just do something. ✨
    Join my wonderful colleague and clinical psychologist, Catherine Morey-Nase and me tomorrow for the first workshop in a new series that we've called Compassionate Conversations. Catherine and I have been hosting retreats together in Byron Bay for six years now and we've decided to get together each quarter to share some of the teachings we've found most helpful in our own lives and the lives of our clients. Tomorrow morning we'll be chatting about the benefits of setting intentions. When: 9am - 10.30am Saturday 18 January (AEST) Where: Online via Zoom Cost: $29 AUD You'll find the booking link in my bio. We would love you to join us. ✨
    Recently, my daughter Meg shared a teaching from trauma-informed therapy that I've found hugely helpful when we want to judge ourselves and others more gently. When someone is going through a period of difficulty or displaying behaviours you find a bit tricky, instead of asking, "what's wrong with them?", instead ask, "what has happened in their life to make situations like these difficult for them?" All of us have had experiences that have caused us distress in some way and we carry those stresses in our bodies. These unconscious influences can lead to habitual ways of responding to the world that are sometimes framed as deficiency. And when we behave like this ourselves, we also judge ourselves as deficient in some way. When Meg shared this research, I found it a wonderful pathway to self-compassion and it can also be the beginning of true healing. If we tune into our bodies and learn about what’s happening during times of difficulty, we can also learn how to better regulate our nervous systems. It's a transformative approach and one that is enormously helpful when we want to find a more peaceful way of interacting in all of our relationships – including the one with ourselves. If you want to learn more about a trauma-informed approach to healing (I think it’s great even if you haven’t experienced trauma) have a listen to Meg's brilliant course on @insighttimer - Journey to Self-Healing. ✨
    I hope you’ve had a beautiful start to the year. I’m still taking it pretty slowly. My intention this year is to see if I can continue to keep the pace a little more gentle. To live in the present as much as possible and savour the small precious moments. Have you found time to reflect on what will make your year truly meaningful? ✨
    5 questions to reflect on as the year comes to a close. You might like to grab your journal and make a note of your answers there. 1. What have you done this year that you can allow yourself to feel proud of? Put aside your humility for a moment and include even the smallest things. 2. What can you forgive yourself for? Turn your attention to self-kindness as you ask yourself this question and accept your imperfect moments (all of us have had them). Remind yourself that we build inner strength and resilience when we embrace opportunities for growth and avoid getting caught in a shame spiral. 3. What are the places, people and activities that have filled you with energy? For me it's anywhere that connects me with the natural world, the friends who love deep conversations and anything to do with creativity. I'd love to hear yours in the comments. 🙏 4. And what are the things that have most depleted you? Intuitively, you know what they are but sometimes they can be hard to admit, even to yourself. Can you move away from any of these next year? 5. What are you looking forward to and who do you most want to be? This is really two questions, but when we put them together, the focus becomes hopeful and positive and filled with possibility. I won't be posting for the next couple of weeks but next Monday 30 Jan at 9.30am Melbourne time, you'll catch me doing a ‘Finding Inner Peace' meditation on Insight Timer. I would love you to join me if you're free. I hope you have a beautiful few weeks and for those who find this time of year a little more difficult, my love and thoughts are with you. 🥰✨
    It’s not often in life that you meet a truly kindred spirit but that’s how it felt when I first met my dear friend and colleague, Catherine Morey-Nase over 12 years ago now. As time has gone on, we have continued to discover many shared interests and passions and maybe more importantly, we view the world in much the same way. We both value the virtue of kindness, we see sensitivity as a strength and we know the transformative effect of self-compassion. After hosting five retreats together, Catherine (who is a Melbourne based Clinical Psychologist) and I have decided to collaborate more often. Next year, we’ll be hosting a series of online workshops which we’ve called Compassionate Conversations. Our focus will be on helping you to: ✨ listen more closely to your heart ✨ live in alignment with your true values ✨ learn to be kinder to yourself ✨ pursue the life you really want, and ✨ to do all of these things gently. Our first workshop will be held on Saturday 18 January at 9am and we’ll be talking about approaching the new year with intention, rather than making New Year’s resolutions or goal setting. We’ll share teachings, our own insights and some wonderful resources. We would love to see you there. You’ll find a link to book in my bio.✨
    This week, see if you can let go of the pressure you’ve been putting yourself under. The sense that you need to be striving. The desire to change something about yourself. Set your intention to be at peace with where you are right now so that you can really live in this moment. ✨
    The theme last week with clients was a general feeling of overwhelm. Amidst the usual pressures that seem to come at this time of year there've been unexpected bills, sick children, leaky ceilings, workplace tensions and understandably, feelings of stress and anxiety. The best antidote to overwhelm is cultivating your capacity for equanimity, but that's not always easy when you're in the thick of it. The following few tips might help though. ✨ Step away from the chaos for ten minutes and breathe your way back to a sense of stillness. ✨ Choose just one thing to tackle first and put your efforts into that. ✨ Acknowledge that you’re at your capacity and say no to anything extra this week. ✨ Even if you feel you don’t have time, switch off your phone and sit down with a quiet cup of tea. ✨ Be brave enough to ask for support and be open about what you need. If you know someone who is overwhelmed right now, offer some practical help. Instead of saying, “let me know what I can do”, be specific about how you can assist. Offer to drop a meal in, collect children from school or lend a hand in the garden. Most overwhelmed people don’t know what they need so it is helpful to be proactive. And if you're in need of some immediate peace, join our beautiful, supportive community, live this morning on Insight Timer where we chat and meditate for around 30 minutes, starting at 9.30am. Everyone is welcome, beginners included. You'll find the link in my bio. 🙏
    I have a handwritten copy of this quote on my desk with the added words: "This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one. Happiness is a journey, not a destination." A reminder that so often think we’ll be happy once things are different in some way. The invitation this week is to pause every now and then and let yourself soak in the beauty and complexity of any given moment. Even if it isn’t perfect, see if you can be at peace with it anyway. ✨
    © Kate James 2025

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